Fear

A few weeks ago, Jason, Aubrey, and I went to Hawaii. On our way there, we hit some CRAZZYYYY turbulence. I must say my worst fear is to crash in the ocean and die and be eaten by whatever animals exist in there. So, of course, I started to cry in the midst of the turbulence. I really thought i was going to die, and Jason said it was the worst turbulence he has ever felt also. It went on for 2 hours of our 5 hour flight. So, naturally, when it was time to come back to San Francisco, I panicked. I mean I seriously panicked. All i could think was that we were going to die on the way home. So, in the midst, I prayed that God would help me because I was about to hyperventilate. I heard God say quietly, "Emily, I am in charge of your life." Thanks God is what I thought, but I thought about it, and for whatever reason, i was calmed. And we didn't crash and die like i thought we would. Flash forward to today, I talked to a couple people, and discovered that i have high liver enzymes. They are double what they should be. So, what is my response? PANICK. I started to pray again, that God would help me, and I heard him say again, "Emily, I am in charge of your life, live freely in me." Of course, to that, i started to cry HYSTERICALLY, this time I was hyperventilating. I spent about an hour or so crying and talking with the Lord. Its amazing how the Lord works. For most, these words may mean nothing, but for me, it seemed to change my life. I could be crazy, but I think the Lord will heal this issue, and I will be fine. I know he can. I should shout these things from the rooftop about how good the Lord is, yet i don't. I don't know why. I'm not afraid of rejection or fearful, I just don't. I think its not my personality. I'm now trying to figure out a way to share what the Lord has done in my life, without being overbearing, because i know, people need to hear. May we not live in fear, but know, that the Lord is in charge of our breath, our life, and we can live freely in Him.